THIS IS
PART OF A LONG SERIES OF VERY FUNNY FAKE CYBERSEX SCENARIOS MADE UP ON THE PITCHFORKMEDIA
MESSAGEBOARD BY A POSTER NAMED DR. NINJAFORKIAN. J-DOGG IS BASED ON A REAL PERSON.
J-Dogg: Ok baby, you promise me you
will stick around till I'm done?
(partner4: Ben Affleck, alone on a saturday night because he is a peice of moldy rat shit,
is posing as a young girl looking for cyber partners.)
Ben:Yeah Mr. Dogg. Anything for you, you are so handsome and studly.
J-Dogg: Good, now I'm into some wierd shit, so don't be surprised aight?
Ben: ok mr. Doggy I promise.
J-Dogg: Aight then, we settle down on the couch...
Ben: Oh romantic? This isn't wierd, I like it like that baby. What else.
J-Dogg: I put in a movie so that your mom can't hear us. It is called "Good Will
Hunting".
Ben: Aaahhhh....
J-Dogg: I like this movie a lot.
Ben: Ok, thats cool.
J-Dogg: You start getting frisky so I put my hand down your undies. They have care
bears on them. You are my 15 year old niece and we are in
my aunts house.
Ben: ohhhh I like where this is going...
J-Dogg: Suddenly this fuck with short dark hair comes on the TV screen. I think his
name is Ben something. He is a real piece of moldy rat shit. I
can't keep it up
because of him. I need some shark fin soup.
Ben: What the fuck, you are the piece of shit, what you got against Ben Affleck, I heard
he's real good in the sack, and gets ALL the ladies.
J-Dogg: Yeah right, I bet he's at home right now geting it on with some guy.
Ben: Fuck you I'm out of here. And Ben Affleck is 100% not gay, I can assure
you of that.
(Ben logs off and cries himself to sleep)
J-Dogg: Goddammit, not again.
J-Dogg: Still not hard either.
J-Dogg: Fuck.
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